Sailing on the “Unfriend” Ship

Sometimes, social networking seems more like social suicide.  While we gain the ability to easily stay in touch with far away friends, we also find ourselves spending more time typing than talking (as in, out loud… to their face).

But excessive exposure to the Internet can often lend itself to experimentation.

Having been on Facebook basically since its birth – anyone else remember when a person’s wall was just a blank spot people scrawled on at whim? – you come to accumulate many unnecessary acquaintances.  Some are friends, while others were merely “friended” as a way to amass an unspeakable number of connections.  But since we’ve come so far since those days without the stalker feed, many of those people we pretended to know seem entirely irrelevant.  Stars, like Jimmy Kimmel, have even instigated designated days where people “unfriend” those they don’t really know because, as Kimmel said, the Facebook “friend” concept cheapens the true sanctity of friendship as it used to be.

In one instance, I remember “unfriending” nearly 400 people from my supposed “friends” list.  I wasn’t even aware that I had met 400 people over my entire lifetime, so to have a grand total of over 600 “friends” on Facebook alone was rather ludicrous.  And now, during times of procrastination, I like to explore Facebook just to see who I’m still connected to and who has “unfriended” me during one of their clean sweeps.  (Honestly, you don’t notice who has suddenly disappeared from your feed until you see their comment on someone else’s wall and wonder why you haven’t seen any recent posts of theirs in forever.)

However, instead of feeling unimportant, I have a new life goal that I will need to accomplish soon, just in case Facebook goes out of style.  I want to become famous (preferably for my writing talents) and watch to see how many of my “unfriended” friends suddenly decide they know me and want to catch up.  Currently, I offer nothing more exciting than the occasional YouTube video and blog entry, but my famous self shall certainly intrigue the public (she says with a sarcastically haughty tone).  Thankfully, Facebook includes the convenient “Deny Request” button with all invitations.

Perhaps that sounds petty, or even a tad ungrateful, but they say you should never forget the little people and, well, clicking that ‘X’ next to my name means many have already forgotten about me.  Plus, no one wants to be friends with someone who only likes them because they’re famous, so I’ve got that argument to back me up, as well.


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